Reflections

A written account taken from my testimony notes which were later expounded:

A week has passed since our Chi Alpha beach retreat and after a week of deep reflection, I thought to write out a few things I began to learn that weekend:

Personal Affirmation or "Self-pat-on-the-back":

Christ calls us to pursue God holistically (Luke 10:27, ref. Deut 6:5)-- not just with your heart, soul, and strength— but also with your mind. Within a culture saturated with romanticism and sentimentalism, the tendency for many Christians today is to love God solely with their emotions on a Sunday morning or wait to get that "spiritual tingle" in a time of worship through song. But God doesn't call us to worship Him solely through an emotional high. Rather, God calls us to worship Him in spirit and in truth (John 4:24). Paul says it well in his letter to the Ephesian church,

I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints.
Ephesians 1:16-18

I was encouraged to this extent-- that this semester, in particular, I made an effort to actively pursue God with my mind. Whether it be through thinking through ethical situations, moral dilemmas, political questions, or even interactions with friends of other faiths and religions-- God's Word has proven to be all-purpose and ever useful (2 Timothy 3:16). Of course this was done with the help of wiser men than I. With the help of Joey and Nathan, my pastors and brothers at Restoration Church, I have been able to find great joy in pursuing God with my mind as a student at a secular university.

Personal Convictions and "Self-kick-in-the-nuts":

In my attempt not to compartmentalize my Christianity by loving God with my mind, I made that my main focus. I pursued God only with my mind, and in doing so, I undermined the other aspects of God that can’t necessarily be fully breached by human intellect. Paul writes about this to the local church in Corinth,

But, as it is written,

"What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,
nor the heart of man imagined,
what God has prepared for those who love him"—

these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God. For who knows a person’s thoughts except the spirit of that person, which is in him? So also no one comprehends the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God.

1 Corinthians 2:9-12

I was broken in this way-- that in trying to reach God solely through my own intellectual endeavors-- I built within myself a metaphorical "tower of babel," one destined to topple, fall, and confuse myself. I was so legalistic in worshiping the truth about God, that I deprived my own spirit from delighting in Him. In doing so, I puffed myself up in my knowledge of God. I lacked humility. I lacked an aspect of worshiping God that He, himself, prescribed-- to worship Him not only in truth, but in spirit! Paul's letter to the Corinthians resonates so well with me,

We know that 'we all possess knowledge.' But knowledge puffs up while loves builds up. Those who think they know something do not yet know as they ought to know. But whoever loves God is known by God.
1 Corinthians 8:1-3

Now that I have spoken about the two, I want to speak of the dangers associated with pursuing God in having to choose either emotional OR mental capacities. There is a real danger in compartmentalizing the Christian worship experience and simply equating it to an emotional high-- hands raised, snot dripping out of the nose, manifestations of the spirit, and the whole nine yards. The lack thereof, especially in some churches and Christian circles, are equated with a lack of God's presence or indwelling within that person's life and may lead to condemnation. There is also a real danger in compartmentalizing the Christian worship experience and simply equating it to intellectual satisfaction-- being able to quote great Christian philosophers, think through ethical problems through a biblical perspective, memorize whole chapters of Scripture, just to name a few.

Attempting to love God based on our own capacities-- whether intellectual or emotional--leads many Christians to become legalistic and base their intimacy with God on the basis of their emotional response to worship or their intellectual capacities rather than the finished work of Christ on the cross. This leads our sinful hearts to critically condemn those who are walking through a "valley of the shadow of death" (Psalm 23:4). But as Christians living in a broken and sinful world, surely there were, are, and will be times wherein our worship of God feels dry and uninspiring or intellectually mundane. Even king David experienced this within his worship life, "You God, are my God, earnestly I seek for you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water" (Psalm 63:1). But we see David take upon a humble attitude. Rather than succumbing to his situation and flailing around in a dry spell-- he went to his source of living water and earnestly sought for refreshing found in the presence of God. I have been convinced that we must all take upon this attitude of humility and genuine passion and love for God within our lives of worship.

Ultimately, our hearts (emotions) and our heads (intellect) must work together, not in contradiction, to love God. It sounds simple-- but it's a truth that, when lived out consistently, will radically change our worship lives and give us a more robust view of the Gospel. To quote Bob Kauflin in his book "Worship Matters,"

"Magnifying God's greatness, then, involves, proclamation and passion... to make sure that in both ways-- biblical truth and strong affections-- people have every opportunity to magnify and encounter our great and awesome God."

What a beautiful calling! What a beautiful God! We, lovers of Christ, have the blessed opportunity of passionately proclaiming Christ crucified and resurrected. I pray that we remain sensitive to God's voice-- both in our hearts and in our minds. In doing say, may God give us all hearts and minds of humility and passion.



In the Love of Our Lord Jesus Christ,
Matthew